Fear is a fickle thing. I’ve lived in it most of my life --26 years of playing out scenarios in my mind, most of which have never come to fruition. I understand, for the most part that this is my minds way of keeping me “safe”. It wants me to survive but I question in only surviving can we really ever thrive?
Its taken a lot of meditation, Gabby Bernstein books, Christine Hassler podcast episodes, a life coach, thousands of affirmations & mantras and a support system of women who are facing the same fears to allow me see the world through the lens of love. It is in love that we can not merely survive but thrive.
Something pretty incredible happens when we’re looking through the lens of love. We believe anything is possible, we trust that the Universe will catch us when we jump, we release judgements of others & see that we’re all doing the best we can & we can open ourselves up to the most incredible relationships.
It sounds crazy, at least it used to for me, to think that we could live a life without fear. Without the worries of day-to-day life. To not worry about money, if the guy will break your heart, if the cheesecake will go straight to your hips & to believe that all humans are doing the best they can. As crazy as that all may sound, its real. I know because for the past six months I’ve lived it.
Today as I sit here writing this I admit fear has crept back in. Ego has a funny way of showing up when everything is going beautifully. I’ve had a magical 6 months, I’ve jumped without fear & the universe has caught me. I believe when we’re so close to all you want in life & ego likes to creep back in. It says things like you’re not worthy of this, you’re living in a fantasy world. Old belief systems creep back in, ones you thought you had released for good. I started to have thoughts like I’ll never be as fit as her, men can’t commit to deep meaningful relationships, I can’t open up to love & I’m not good at this business stuff. I kind of surprised myself because I really believed I had released my limiting beliefs once and for all.
I believe that once you’ve known love and once you’ve seen through the lens of love you can return to love and so I shifted my thoughts. The guy who ghosted me was doing the best he could with the emotional tools he has. The business deal that didn’t work out wasn’t meant to be & likely something better will come because of it. That rude woman at the grocery store could of had something really heartbreaking happen on her way there and wasn’t processing her emotions.
Love isn’t always the easy choice and it takes work to see through the lens of love day to day. It takes getting past our own ego, our own wounds and our own hurts to see things in a different light. Yes its ok to feel hurt, frustrated or angry at times and we should always honor these feelings but at the end of the day we get to choose to see the world in the lens of fear or love. Given the choice I choose love, every time.